Consistently incompetent

Doing my current job reminds me of a lecturer. She once said that if she could choose her own students, she would choose 5 people from my MAF class. Unsurprisingly, those 5 people didn't include me.

I just wanted to say that I've never been chosen for anything, but a senior wants me to assist her in her next week's job. Zzzzz, I've been doing stupid mistakes right and left and that makes me nervous. I know that learning takes time and when it comes to someone who's as slow as me, the learning is twice longer but then 2 seniors badmouthed a junior in front of me because the junior doesn't know a lot even though she's been working at the firm for 5 months already. I think she knows a whole lot more than me so it got me thinking, whatever these people talk about me behind my back, since I think I'm the most incompetent person there.

I don't think I can trust any of these people. That's why I've been watching what I say when I'm talking to them. And I'm taking notes too. Don't want to piss some people off you see. I've been doing lots of mistakes, I don't want to add them up.

There's this one trainee at my firm, she's only been there for a month but people have already labelled her as rude. It's funny because she's been complaining about some people there who she said have no manners when some people have been telling me the same thing about her too. I refrain myself from saying much while I'm working, because I know I always say the wrong things all the time. So I keep everything to myself. I think people there think that I'm very quiet and boring. Oh well, as long as I don't cari pasal with them, that's okay I guess.

Aaah working life, I don't know why it's so hard.

And I don't know why I'm still surprised when people don't get what I say and I don't get what people say.

I'm gonna put on my orangest baju during the Sneijder v Spain match nanti. Go Sneijder!!!!